I knew of a man who was sent to the State Prison for twenty-five years. All these years he was always thinking of his home, and counting by years, months, and days, the time till he should be free, and see his family and friends once more. The years roll on, the time of imprisonment is over, the man is free. He leaves the prison gates, he makes his way to his old home, but his old home is not there. The house in which he had dwelt in his childhood had been torn down, and a new one had been put up in its place; his family were gone, their very name was forgotten, there was no one to take him by the hand to welcome him back to life.
So it was with me. I had crossed the line of which I had so long been dreaming. I was free; but there was no one to welcome me to the land of freedom, I was a stranger in a strange land, and my home after all was down in the old cabin quarter, with the ole folks, and my brothers and sisters. But to this solemn resolution I came: I was free, and they should be free also; I would make a home for them in the North, and the Lord helping me, I would bring them all there.
The 113th (Congress) hasn’t passed the bills every Congress does like a highway bill, or a defense bill, or a farm bill, or a budget. But what do we need a budget for? Clearly not for highways, defense or food! Besides, Congress did pass a bill insuring that people can fish near dams on the Cumberland River, AND (House Republicans) also passed deep cuts in food stamps for the poor. Which is good solid governing, because the poor don’t need food stamps anymore now that they can fish near dams on the Cumberland River.
—STEPHEN COLBERT, on what is now officially the least productive Congress — only 55 bills passed this year, with only a week left in their session — in American history, on The Colbert Report (via inothernews)